I’m not sure where I first came across this work, it might’ve been on a library list of YA novels to read, or it might’ve been a random Insta ad/post by someone I follow.
Either way, I added it to my list immediately and promptly forgot about it. When we went on vacation last month this was one of the few reserve books I took with me that I didn’t quite make it to, so I slotted it in at first chance and am so glad I finally got around to reading it. If I would’ve read it on vacation it would’ve taken half as long, but I kept falling asleep reading it this time (stupid time change).
There were so many things to love about this book from the BIPOC protagonists to the Spanish and Vietnamese dropped in casually without translation to the ridiculous friends who make Luna and Mat’s lives that much richer and better.
And to all QTBIPOC youth, especially my Mexican American, Chicanx, and Tejanx sobrines. Always know of your beauty and power and strength and that you are plenty enough for this world exactly as you are. This book is for you. (Acknowledgments)
Seriously though, I can’t say how much I loved that this book wasn’t written for me explicitly. Even though I identify as a gay man like the two protagonists, that’s it. That’s our only connection. I speak enough Spanish that I understood the non-slang parts, but that was it. And I LOVED IT. I didn’t love it as a field trip into another culture, I loved it because Villa wrote it from the heart and wrote it for their people and the rest of us are just lucky enough to get to experience the journey for a little while.
I’m not going to talk about the abuse in the novel, it’s a big part and it’s important, but I don’t want to waste my space and your time on it. It doesn’t limit or define Luna, it helps him grow and pushes him further in life and that’s all you can ask from such a horrible situation. I will say I burst into tears when Luna had this exchange with Güelo (his grandfather):
‘Desde el momento en que te vi, eras mío. You were our baby. And Abuelita and I were unconditionally in love with you. In the eighteen years you’ve existed, that hasn’t changed. Nothing will ever change that, mi’jito.”
‘¿Usted sabe?’
‘Well, you weren’t at your dad’s. Makes an old man curious. Tu abuela connected the dots a long time ago, though, Julián. We told each other that, whenever you were ready, we’d let you know that it didn’t matter to us. Your dad might have his way of dealing with things, and I have my opinions on that. Pero, your abuelita would haunt my dreams if I didn’t tell you and keep reminding you how much we love you. And that all we want is for you to know love in this life. The gravest sin of all would be to keep you from experiencing the fullness of this life. As long as whoever you give your heart to is good to you and for you and doesn’t put ketchup on his tamales, then bueno.’ (280)
I was impressed my Spanish was still functioning at midnight, but legit was so happy he had Xo (his sister), his friends, and the unexpected support of his grandfather. I also loved that Villa introduced a pan character later in the novel, but didn’t make a big deal out of it because it’s amazing when I look back at HS how many friends ended up being somewhere on the rainbow; like recognize like.
The part that I wasn’t expecting was to laugh as much as I did and relate so much to Luna’s inability to exist without embarrassing himself. I had my fair share of idiotic things happen, but I cannot tell you how relieved I am that social media didn’t pick up until I was almost out of undergrad. Imagining what happened to Luna was holy shit terrifying. These two passages legit had me laughing because the first one: been there done that; and the second one: just pure gold.
Someone hit on me. Real-life hit on me. I hope I didn’t come off as rude? What if he was only looking for a friend who’s into reading? No, he definitely had those eyes of interest. And it was . . . nice? Not that it makes a difference. But—ugh, chinga la madre. If I had been watching where I was going, this wouldn’t have happened and—whatever. I can’t think about this right now. (147)
‘Let’s get this out of the way now,’ Khan says. ‘We all know what’s about to happen in our guest bedroom tonight. Both of us were eighteen before. We know we can’t change your minds, and we’re not gonna try to.’
‘But remember the four Cs for good gay sex,’ Ruben adds. ‘Consent, cleanliness, communication, and condoms.’
‘Did you come up with that on the spot?’ his husband asks.
‘Yeah, it just came to me.’
‘That’s brilliant. Write it down somewhere. But work in lube somehow. Because that’s important too. Obviously. Maybe condomsandlube. Say it real quick together.’
‘Or how about you lubriCANT have good gay sex without the four Cs.’
‘Yes. That’s so good, I think—’
‘CAN WE LEAVE?’ Mat screams at the two, who are now completely ignoring us.
‘Yes, you may go,’ Khan replies. (231)
Seriously, I’ve been hit on maybe twice in my life and both times had no idea what was happening, what to do with myself, or how to talk to the other person. The two I recall were both just awkward AF and I’m sure I made them even more so.
The other thing Villa did well was toing the line between saccharine sweet and kitschy/parody. Luna and Mat meet via social media and live 1,500 miles apart (Texas and California), they get to know each other via chat and phone calls, and throughout the entirety of the book, they only spend about 12 days together. It works and it’s both adorable and agonizing, and it could’ve gone SO wrong. And after Luna’s sole visit to CA during the novel we’re left with this:
‘You’re my moonlight, Julián Luna. A brightness in the dark. I knew if I kept trying, one day I’d reach out and you’d be there. You’d be here.’
I look up at my boyfriend, thinking of when I first liked his senior pictures six and a half months ago. That were taken only a couple of miles from where we’re at right now. Half a country away from where I was.
And how every choice I’ve made since then has led me here. With him. With @sunnysideup213.
‘Then you’re my sunshine, Mặt Trời Pham. Since the day I met you, when I would wake up feeling scared, anxious, or alone, you’ve been my warmth and clarity. I’m lucky you found me.’
‘I’m lucky you finally allowed yourself to be seen.’ (267)
And yes, it’s almost too sweet to really be good, but it toes that line. They’re acknowledging their faults and the way they’ve grown in the six-ish months they’ve known each other and their passionate week or so together.
Villa did a wonderful job at limiting the sex and tension between them. It is there and when they’re together they get it on, but for the most part, everything happens off-page. I have to assume that some questions were dealt with off-page around sexual position/preferences and I almost wish those would’ve been brought on-page even if the actual acts weren’t. I was a little annoyed that it felt like assumptions were made about who would do what and that things wouldn’t change, but we really don’t know.
The big crisis of the novel, of course outside of the distance, the abuse Luna faces, the various friend drama, is whether Luna will get to go to University in California. There are admissions questions, there are financial implications, and it weighs heavily on their relationship. I’m glad Villa didn’t include an epilogue and that everything ends not long after high school graduation with a happy for now ending, which usually aren’t satisfying for me.
Recommendation: This was a wonderfully adorable and hilarious coming of age/coming out young adult LGBT romance. I cannot stress enough how much I loved that Villa didn’t translate the Spanish or Vietnamese that was included (if you really want to know you can look it up yourself) and it didn’t detract from the novel at all. There was so much to love about this novel and so little to not enjoy. There is physical abuse (on and off-page) that could deter readers, but it wasn’t gratuitous. Seriously, go read this book. I’ve already added Villa’s next book (Ander and Santi Were Here) to my list 😀
Opening Line: “One question runs through my mind as I stare blankly at page eighty-seven of my Fundamentals of Physics textbook: Why the fuck did I let my friends force me into taking this class?”
Closing Line: “I know that I am worthy. That I am enough. And that’s enough for right now. Because I’m just getting started.” (Whited out to avoid spoilers, highlight to read.)
Additional Quotes from Fifteen Hundred Miles from the Sun
“I don’t doubt they have their own suspicions about my sexuality, but I’m thankful they’re allowing me to figure out when, where, and how I come to terms with and vocalize it.” (12)
“It happened. I came out. Whether I meant to or not, would have preferred this happen any other way or not, felt ready or not. Sure, I’m scared. And even more angry with myself for being this irresponsible. But I feel undoubtedly lighter. Freer. The heaviness from the fear that my friends or my sister would reject me is gone. I’m still worried that going back to school on Monday will be a nightmare. Disappointing Güelo and the millions of ways this will not go well with Dad. But I have right now. And when I manage to block out all the negative thoughts vying for my attention, my happiness is incalculable.” (44)
“‘But I mean, if you want a boyfriend, I hope you get one. You deserve to be happy, compa. And if that’s not what you want, well, we can be single together. Bros before—what is it for gays? Before other bros? Oh, bros before boys! Like, fuckboys!’
‘Roe, shut up and eat your chips.'” (106)
“‘I’m thinking of that Frida Kahlo poem.’ He takes my hand and kisses my palm. ‘The one that’s like, you should have someone who doesn’t mind if you’re messy, and who will make you feel safe against all the things that keep you awake. Who will take on the world with you, hand in hand. And who, every time we hug, will remind you that this—us—was meant to be.'” (272)
“I mean, for a while it’s been all, Oh, he’s cute. And then I turn my head and I’m like, Wow, she’s cute too, and so are they. I don’t know, my attraction filter doesn’t seem to care about gender. It’s—actually, I don’t know how it’s filtered. I’m still figuring it out.” (300)
“Being gay isn’t something I was able to choose. To be happy, to get out of bed every morning, to be strong and brave and proud of who I am, sure. Those were choices.
Just like being an intolerant asshole is a choice. An that’s on you, Dad.” (332)